Reviewed by Scott Axelrod
I can’t say that I’m able to completely wrap my brain/wiener around the idea of any possible secrets hiding inside of SecretVirgin.com. As a site starring a generous helping of pretty, cute, sexy, charming and innocent-looking lasses hailing predominantly from Eastern Europe, Russia and Canada, everything here is overtly laid out in the open—mostly with spread legs and labia—with nothing appearing to be recently uncovered and unclassified content from the Cold War. Covert ops aside, if you like your ladies young, naked, touching themselves, each other and some penis, this colorful collection should make you spill as much, if not more, than the most intensely interrogated of spy suspects.
With sharp, high-quality, screen-filling photos, each model has been rationed her own individual page(s) that find her posing through no less than 96 thumbnailed shots. Although these aren’t mind-blowingly original undressing sessions, everyone here is naturally attractive enough to warrant the turning of heads and spontaneous unzipping of flies.
Ranging from the typical baby oil breast kneading to the in-shower pubic beard shaving, bench-pressing with a dude’s balls balanced on a forehead; untying a top while atop an exercise bike; hanging a hula-hoop off of a pair of hard pointy nipples; and, the always popular thrusting of a bush against a Christmas tree, reveals everyone’s archetypal solo fantasy scenarios as a mixture of manual and toy-assisted self-diddling washes over each theme. The girl/girl and girl/girl/girl occurrences find plenty of these frisky fems exploring familiar territory, as the fistful of boy/girl boot-knockings shuffle through predictable positions until the inevitable pop.
The Windows Media Player videos all work well in high definition when they eventually finish up their few minutes of downloading. Complete with a couple of complimentary lines of straighforward synopsis, none of the action veers completely off course to leave you stranded and pantsless and wondering what happened to the girls in the pictures who caused your beanstalk to start growing in the first place. Via riddle and cloak-and-dagger-free links, navigation is breezy, taking you to the specific variations of material offered—“Models with photo sets,” “Models with video sets,” “Models with photo & video.”
As “Live Teen Chat (Hot!)” is still forthcoming as of this review, longtime admirers of the young, the amorous, the similar-looking and the European, should likely be sated with what SecretVirgin.com has on hand. The ladies here all prove to be more than whack-worthy, even though you won’t be able to remember if the girl you’re currently whacking it to is the same girl who you whacked it to the last four times you whacked it—which come to think of it, might just be the secret after all.
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