Reviewed by Scott Axelrod
Before you go getting all inclined to think that this site might cause you to grow a halo and that well-endowed, bare-breasted and winged angels brandishing harps are going to burst forth from your computer screen bathed in a soft glowing, yet brilliantly bright white light, get down on your knees and pray that you will never jump to conclusions after only reading a website address again. Never ever again.
Heavenlyknockers.com is unfortunately not the fulfillment of some perverted version of a messianic prophecy. In fact, there’s barely even enough content on it to fulfill one’s usual checklist of what constitutes a site containing entertainment adult or otherwise.
With only five girls to look at (when this review was written) - Brooke, Chaka T., Wendy White, “Asian With Big Natural Tits,” and Merry - I don’t see how you’d find this basically pointless presentation to begin with, let alone decide to willingly fill its collection plate with a membership fee. Okay, maybe I’m being a bit melodramatic, or even blasphemous, because the site is part of the large Pornstar Network that has not only converted many Internet porn viewers who now preach its gospel and sign on to it religiously, but is the only reason this so-called site is receiving any stars whatsoever.
Cut from the same cloth as sites like ClubVanessaBlue.com in its set-up, but with ladies lacking Blue's sexual finesse and enthusiasm, HeavenlyKnockers.com contains streaming video footage and hardcore photo content for each of the girls. Each video runs just about 15 minutes long and is viewable at high or low speed in Windows Media and QuickTime. The picture and sound quality are good enough, while the action is unoriginal and nothing nearly close to causing a second cumming. The ladies all have large floppy breasts, and have sex with some guy for your viewing pleasure. That’s all there is; nothing else. The photo galleries are mostly blurry screen caps taken from the videos. Each of girls ends up “taking a load,” in the 50-70 of these included shots. That’s all there is here, too; nothing more to see.
If you manage to escape back into The Pornstar Network, you’ll find that you didn’t sell your soul to the brief site I just briefly sermonized, as you can bask in the opportunity to view material featuring many popular genres and many of your favorite sex stars including: Jill Kelly, Silvia Saint, Peter North, Lexington Steele, Gauge, Taylor Rain, and a lot more. This is the only redeeming feature of HeavenlyKnockers.com, a site that definitely needs a miracle and a hearty helping of hallelujahs to pull it out of crappy-site damnation. Let us all say Amen.
HeavenlyKnockers
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