Reviewed by Scott Axelrod
Do all big asses have to be cellulite-dimpled chunks of jiggle comparable to cottage cheese stuffed into Ziploc bags and tap danced on with golf cleats? I guess you can guess that we can reasonably say: "No way!" Voted anal site of the year (who’s part of the club honored with getting those ballots in the mail?), AssTitans.com turns a cheek towards the big and bouncy but smooth-skinned butts of broads who aren’t shy and don’t shy away from getting gratuitously banged in those popular puckered holes. Starring a group of eastern European dudes (the site is registered in Budapest, so let’s just be presumptuous here) who spend their afternoons teaming up on a roster of porn stars, this is one hardcore orifice-fixated odyssey that you may not return from feeling the same way about the simple pleasures of anal sex.
Squeezing out roughly 30 gals (with regular updates) into a colorful and inviting multi-paged presentation, members are afforded access to a large collection of Windows Media/iPod-formatted, quick-responding streams and multispeed downloads of high-quality video that are also viewable in luxurious HD for those who really want to get up close and proctological—more on the joy of that in a minute. Part gonzo, part who let the lunatics have sex in the asylum, this posse of pervos has almost as many costume changes as an evening with Cher. Swapping comic book superhero duds and other odd accessories for those of your typically sweat-drenched swordsmen while simultaneously swapping fluids with such sexed-up starlets as Harmony Rose, Flower Tucci, Audrey Bitoni, Kelly Wells, Savanah Stern, Luscious Lopez, Poppy Morgan and other familiar faces, this is some of the most action-packed fudgepacking you’ve likely ever seen.
Besides chuckle-worthy hijinks that include escorting a blindfolded babe from out of a locked closet and zipping a petite sweetie into a conveniently sized suitcase with only a giant rubber dick to keep her company, everyone onboard remains all smiles, eager and anxious to screw. The women readily suck and slobber over any number of pricks standing and swinging in front of them, before assuming positions in which they take multiple penetrations from their hosts’ respective schwanzstuckers. Ramming and reaming with enough force to knock most amateurs into concussion-induced unconsciousness, these experienced ladies are ultimately left with generous boy-sauce deposits that are not only queefed out and/or cum swapped, but drip and slip from their gaping rectums in close-up shots that clearly capture the elusive and mythologized “Pink Sock”—which in medial speak, refers to the partially prolapsed rectums that literally (and in this case, purposely) pop out of their poopchutes peek-a-boo style.
Along with clear thumbnail pic galleries, screen caps, bonus videos and a few other extras to drop in your sack, AssTitans.com ultimately holds the ass and it’s golden hole in high regard, as it itself stands as a testament to extremely explicit exhibitions of penetration rarely found in your everyday and expendable anal play displays.
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