Reviewed by SexHerald Staff
“Tag! You’re It!” starts with two full grown naked men going at it on a brown leather couch. Antonio York and Ulizes Carpelli might be called bears in the porn world, since they actually have some hair on their chest and aren’t skinny twinks, but more important than their body size and labels are the excellent chemistry and enthusiasm between them. I dug how the action froze as the credits scrolled across their bodies – one way to ensure they won’t get fast-forwarded is to surround the text with a bald headed goatee guy sucking cock. When Antonio starts topping Ulizes’s ass until he comes all over his chest, I thought, ‘I don’t care what else happens in this movie, that scene was worth the price of admission.’
The camera pulls back and the plot reveals itself to be a porn movie about making a porn movie – how wonderfully meta. Tag is the assistant on the set, eager for a chance at a starring role, but the director, Dillon Press, is more interested in acquiring popular model, Nick Young. There’s amusingly cheesy dialogue negotiating the deal, with Dillon looking hilarious and sexy in a dressing robe. The director is short on cash, so he gets on his knees and starts sucking Nick’s uncircumcised cock. The blowjob goes on for awhile, until Nick switches from domineering bossy model to eager and willing bottom boy: wanting his ass licked, dropping to his knees to deep throat, then wanting to be fucked. Dillon obliges. The scene goes on longer than I’d like – I don’t to see the initial slow penetration: skip right to the moaning and plowing, which goes on for awhile too. You won’t have to worry about shooting your load before they do.
The next scene has Tag pleading his case to another porn actor, John Marcus, and Steven Richards, the makeup guy. Tag leaves, and John asks Steven to fluff. Even though Steven is wearing a “sixty-nine t-shirt”, he didn’t seem so enthused while giving head, his lips barely passed the tip. I suppose one can enjoy oral sex even with a gag reflex, but when John dropped to his knees to reciprocate, Steven’s cock wasn’t hard and seemed slow going. Perhaps he should lose the t-shirt for false advertising. John bends over the makeup counter and gets fucked from behind, which I couldn’t help thinking might ruin his chance to get hard again when filming starts. I had time for idle thoughts because the scene is long and repetitive, without much varying of camera angles.
We reach the big finale, where the star throws a tantrum and leaves the set, giving Tag his big break. He steps into the scene to get blown by Andy Dill, but Tag instead commands, “use me.” And he gets used. The videographer and photographer (Nick Capra and Parker Williams) join in on the action, all three of them using and abusing Tag in a delicious display of cock-choking and manhandling. Tag loves every slapping and slurping moment, culminating, of course, into a gangbang-style fucking. This scene goes on and on and on as well, but this time I’m grateful. It ends with them all shooting on Tag’s chest, some of them twice.
The movie starts and ends superbly, with the scenes in the middle slightly above par. A good flick if you like long slow fucks in your porn and a nice example of the work of the famous dirty sloppy bottom, Tag Adams. Tag!You're It! Tag!You'reIt!
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