Reviewed by SexHerald Staff
Ten thousand years from now, after civilization as we know it has been gone for ages, some future archaeologist will find a copy of Real Adventures 61 buried under tons of debris. His super technology will allow him to quickly determine the way to view the recorded media and so he will watch, on his holographic eye implant, footage of girls in "wet thong" and Spring Break striptease contests and men chanting "Show some bush!" until everybody's sick of it. The archaeologist will then deduce that the chants are religious in nature, the girls were picked either as a sacrifice or as an object of worship or perhaps both, and that this civilization died out mercifully to be replaced with one where dogs were given the executive power to rule over the populace. I don't know.
I do know that it was more fun thinking about dystopian futures than it was to watch Real Adventures 61, which I guess is saying something. Another entry in the pseudo-amateur genre, the video presents a wide variety of girls in varying states of dress -- from true girls right off the street at Mardi Gras, to the aforementioned wet thong booty-shaking contests, all the way up to a pro-am pole dance competition and one girl hired by Dreamgirls to flash her wares in public for interstitial scenes. It's fun to watch her in the supermarket, glancing around corners to make sure the coast is clear before lifting her skirt just as some bored employee barks out an announcement on the PA, but it grows tiresome: in a subsequent scene she's jumping up and down slightly in place while on a beach, and she looks as bored as the rest of us.
The striptease contest that makes up the bulk of the video is tedious at best, with an annoying emcee who continually leads his audience in chants of "HEEEY WE WANT SOME PUS-SAY" whether they feel the need to chant or not. Some of the girls are nice to look at, but honestly, your eyes will glaze over after the ninth or tenth girl. When viewing these contests we also rarely learn who exactly wins, so those who stick around for the sake of the narrative will be truly disappointed.
There are some entertaining spots, though. The Mardi Gras segments are the most fun because they really do feature real girls. Real drunk girls, yes, but real natural girls nonetheless and not girls who've gone into a career of modeling and dancing and who automatically go into poledance mode when they hear the first testosterone hoots in the air. You'll see more of them than of the natural girls, which is a shame, as the natural girls come in all shapes and sizes while the professional girls, at least the ones in this video, seem to only come in one.
So is Real Adventures 61 worth killing an evening over? Not hardly. Is it worth viewing for the Mardi Gras girls? No, since you can easily find better footage from other sources, without the boring stuff in between. Is it worth viewing so you can imagine crazy madcap visions of the future? Probably not, but hey, give it a try if you're a science-fiction writer stuck for a few ideas. Perhaps you'll be the one who writes a Twilight Zone-meets-Brave New World ending for our archaeologist tale, an ending where his own civilization is depraved enough that the footage he sees is absolutely tame in comparison. RealAdventures#61
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