Reviewed by SexHerald Staff
Before I even get to the actual sex in this one, let’s talk
title. What does it mean to be ON porn? Wouldn’t First Time
IN Porn make more sense? While the title might make you think, “Ooh,
amateurs,” a better reaction would be, “Maybe there’s
a reason these girls have never been in porn before.” Doughy
in all the wrong places, pale, pimply, these girls took realism to
a new and unwelcome level.
Even the pigtails and white knee-highs of the Marcia — normally
a slam dunk for me almost regardless of the other circumstances
— couldn’t conceal her world-weary truck stop waitress
look. She might as well have been chewing gum and filing her nails.
And with the strikingly different quality of this vignette’s
video, it was clearly an afterthought to round out the collection.
Marcia trudges through the routine and camera flashes pop repeatedly
as the poor girl does double duty for some lonely picpost at the
edges of the internet.
The DVD also subjects the viewer to an interminable series of ads
for sex lines before getting to the movie. Each of them features
a different combination of people fucking energetically on the hoods
of cars and the backs of motorcycles. No reason for the props is
given, and you can’t skip ahead to the DVD menu.
This DVD is not entirely without appeal, but it can be summed up
in the star of its first vignette, Nikki Dawn. Tall and willowy
with small, natural breasts and a wide mouth, she plays a girl auditioning
to sing lead for a garage band. Call me a sucker, but for a few
moments during her scene, I really believed she was an inexperienced
porn actress. Though the choreography of the scene was mundane,
she went at it hesitantly and at times, even with a shyness that
suggested a genuine amateur. Take, for instance, the way she rides
her partner (a truly repellent, potbellied little man). Rather than
bouncing around as though riding a mechanical bull, tossing her
hair and displaying the in-and-out for maximum effect, she grinds
her hips slowly, pausing periodically to make small noises and hide
her face from the camera. FirstTimeonPorn#5 In short, she looked like a person actually
having real sex, and isn’t that the whole point here?
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