Title: Cargo Studio: Wicked Pictures Director: Jonathan Morgan Cast: Felecia, Lezley Zen, Stormy, Devon Michaels, Kaylani Lei, Mason Storm, Tony Tedeschi, Julian, Herschel Savage, Evan Stone, Jack Spade, Mike Horner (non sex role) Genres:: Plot, Couples, Drama Condoms: Yes Reviewer: SexHerald Staff

Rating:

Any movie with this high a proportion of screen time devoted to non-sex scenes falls squarely in the “Plot” category. We’ve got a lot of things going on here: estranged family, unexpected criminal love affair, and mafia shakedown. If you think this combination is sounding a little heavy for a porno, you might be right. You would be wrong, however, to assume that this means the sex is bad.

The plot isn’t even that easy to summarize; feature star Stormy doesn’t get along with her lawyer/politician stepdad (played by old timer Mike Horner), and is about to leave for art school in Chicago when she’s kidnapped. The bungling kidnapper, Stormy’s onscreen friend played by Tony Tedeschi, has his car stolen – with Stormy in the trunk (Tony is secretly working for Herschel Savage’s character, a mafia boss whose brother was put away by Stormy’s mean dad). Wait, there’s more. The carjacker is played by Julian, who we’ll talk about in a minute, a goon under Evan Stone’s character (who just got out of prison and has connections to Herschel) who suddenly finds himself a strange (but oh so pretty) girl in the trunk of one of his “lifts.”

Confusing? I don’t write the stories, I just write the reviews. And who writes the stories? None other than Stormy herself. I thought her writing debut, Kink, went a lot better though.

Luckily, the sex – when we have time for it in between developing this monster plot – delivers. The opener has Tony devouring a luscious and fantastically responsive Lezley Zen, an onscreen buddy of Stormy’s, followed by Evan and Kaylani Lei getting turned on by carjacks. I liked watching Lezley give as good as she gets (and veteran Tony can give some, make no mistake), and the Evan-Kaylani duo manage to keep the hungry-monkey-sex thermometer turned way up.

Mafia boss Herschel chews out the inept Tony, and proceeds to blow off a little steam with Mason Storm and Devon Michaels. Threesomes are almost always great, but what makes this one stand out some is how every position configuration works really well to maximize the sensuality of the fuck. This more than compensates for the fact that Herschel doesn’t pull out a lot of his make-a-woman-wild guns (for insight, check his performance in The Other Side of Serenity).

Thereafter begins the longest stretch of a sequence ever. Evan of course has figured out who Stormy is, and holds her for ransom. He brilliantly names Julian his hostage caretaker.

The interaction between Julian and Stormy damn near qualifies this movie as a chick flick. The whole bad boy with a good heart thing is a huge part of this movie. Even a little restraint would’ve made all the difference, but as it is, I was getting just a little sick of this whole semi-Byronic, tough and tattooed but (unbearably) sensitive good guy “forced” into a life of crime. Then again, I’ve never had a thing for bad boy’s myself. Ladies: you, on the other hand, may find Julian’s character quite the turn-on.

And there’s a lot to sink your teeth in too, in terms of how long their conversation stretches out. Of course, it’s interspersed with visual tales of Stormy’s sex history – starting with young innocence blowing then boyfriend Nick Spade, through to a lesbian fling (featuring Felecia) after bad boyfriends. The latter was also a little over the top, with flowers, ultra-soft lighting... I think it’s fair to say that the lesbians I know at least, would be a little offended (even for a straight sex flick).

The culmination of this sexual history of course is the inevitable Julian-Stormy fuck:

“Do you want to kiss me, Julian?”

“Maybe..”

She turns away, he grabs her arm and pulls her back into his arms.

Gag.

But hey, a little soap opera in porn can be amusing. The fuck itself is not terribly inspiring, but after all that buildup (and talk talk talk), it’s a nice release. And usually, when you watch that kind of buildup (on daytime TV, say), you don’t get to see the titties and dick actually come out to play. So that’s a treat.

The acting on the whole is sometimes plain bad, but sometimes bad enough to be quite entertaining. It was nice to see Mike Horner again, though his dick we aren’t reacquainted with. Julian actually plays his role pretty well (I’d say it’s a writing/directing mistake to have let things go a little overboard), and Stormy holds her own too – but in the final analysis, you’ll want to pay more attention to what she’s holding when she’s naked. Also, watch out for the old school bonus scene from Priceless with Peter North and Jenna Jameson – an amusing find that looks like it’s from about 5-15 years back.