Product: Mike's Hard Lemonade: Near Beer on a Summer Night Producer: Mike's Hard Lemonade Approximate Retail Value: $2/11.2 oz Category: Beer Country of Origin: USA Reviewer: R. Pietsch The F Words: Flavor – Acidic, yet Sprite-ful. Feel – Tightly carbonated to balance out the sugar. Finish – Long, dry and unsatisfying.

Rating:

Fridays are perfect for enjoying this blistering New York summer. Neighborhood bars open their doors in the late afternoon to overheated patrons fresh out of work and the patios fill as happy hour ensues. On one of these Friday afternoon excursions, I met a girl on one of these patios, shrugging off the air conditioning inside to sit in the shade. I headed directly for the restroom and as I did so, she asked what I would like to drink. “Surprise me” came out as what I thought was a whimsical reply. Upon her return, she had done just that.

I sat staring at an opened bottle of Mike’s Hard Lemonade and a girl who was grinning from ear-to-ear as she sat drinking her Guinness. I smiled. She had, after all, surprised me. I didn’t know what I was going to do with this bottle. Let’s face it – Mike’s Hard Lemonade is not exactly what I drink now (you know, that Guinness she had looked great . . .)

It had been years since I’d even tasted a Mike’s. Since the last experience with Mike’s, I have tried the spin-offs, such as Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi Breezer. All drinks of this type signify the homogenization of the beer world; all of them were markedly the same and not to my liking. Of course, personally, I would have loved a Guinness as well, but being that I had a hard day, I figured I might as well have a Mike’s.

This foggy liquid looks less like lemonade, more like a Tom Collins, and smells just like sprite. My first taste of Mike’s in years was actually a little surprising. Yes, it has the same malted flavor that is to be expected from any wine cooler-esque drink, but it was far more refreshing than I’d remembered. It is rather sweet, but fortunately it’s tightly carbonated to the point that it’s palatable. You can feel the sugar on your teeth as you drink it, and it sticks to the tongue after swallowing. It left my mouth dry enough that I couldn’t help but take another swig. Of course, my ulterior motive was to get it all down before it became either warm or partially flat.

With the bottle quickly emptied and a sugar-induced stomachache fast approaching, I was grateful for the high-alcohol content of the malt beverage to help take my mind off it. Sure, Mike’s wasn’t as bad as I’d remembered it being some odd years ago; but, I think I can go another odd years and not miss it.