Title: The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists Author: Neil Strauss Publisher: Regan Books Publish Date: 2005 Pages: 425 Genres:: Non-Fiction, How-To Guide, Memoir, Sociology Reviewer: J. Henry

Rating:

The first print edition of The Game resembles the Bible with a red sash that serves as a bookmark, leather-bound cover with the title in golden embroidery that matches the paper edges; indeed, The Game may serve as a holy reference for men looking for the answers to pick up women and enter the seduction community. Author/journalist Neil Strauss didn’t only observe PUAs (pickup artists)–acronyms and all–he is one, and apparently a good one at that. Strauss depicts the underworld of pickup artists to a ‘T,’ not only reflecting in hindsight on his own misdirection, but avidly noticing those around him and detailing their appreciation and obsession with this culture as well. What Strauss notices is human nature: the reality that women are not so different from men in behavior whether it is sexual or psychological.

Strauss begins The Game near the end, with him and several other PUAs in a gorgeous mansion in Southern California, seemingly living the life as his former mentor, Mystery, slowly succumbs to depression and others to their own type of madness. Reflecting on how life got to this point, Strauss introduces the reader to a secret society that they may have been aware of but weren’t sure of how successful and addictive the game could become. Divided into the eight parts of what’s essential about ‘sarging’ (picking up women), he details how he got started in this community and ultimately became a guru for many newcomers under his alter-persona, Style.

Neil Strauss attended many pickup artist seminars, taking bits and pieces from each, and he formed his own method for picking up women while also becoming a ‘wing’ (male friend who generally assists one in ‘sarging’) to his first pickup artist and the man who’d become a close friend, Mystery. In doing so, he goes from AFC (average frustrated chump) to official PUA. (With all the acronyms, it’s especially helpful that Strauss provides a glossary of terms in the back of the book.) What follows is a myriad of experiences, both positive and negative, that lead Strauss to realize the mundane aspects of becoming a successful PUA. What is worrisome about this community and what Strauss picks up on is that ‘sarging’ becomes an alternate lifestyle for many to manipulate women into sleeping with them or to enact their sexual fantasies.

In The Game, Strauss is not only the reader’s guide into this environment, but he also serves as the voice of reason and at times the conscious of the whole PUA atmosphere. His appreciation of his girlfriend, Lisa, at the end is what makes him a mentor to the others and a suitable guide in The Game. He becomes a father figure to many younger PUAs he meets; his life becomes a brass ring of sorts; and in the end, he finds a beautiful girlfriend whom he finds a real connection. What becomes lost on those who include themselves in this community is that becoming a PUA is not just about sleeping with as many women as you can; it’s about building confidence. Strauss notes that many of the AFCs he started off with did not have a core goal in mind. Without one, being a PUA is literally a game; the players become obsessed with getting to the next level. At first, it’s about number-closing (getting a woman’s number after first meeting her), then it’s about getting a date, afterwards it’s about sleeping with her. After which the players force themselves to set the bar higher it’s about having a threesome with two women and so on and so forth the bars raises and may become more demeaning towards women.

Strauss notes that a reason for this may be that once upcoming PUAs realize that women can be as faulty as men, cheating on boyfriends with guys they just met, sleeping with several men without hesitation, they become disenchanted with the female form and consider her just an object. As Strauss came to terms with the reality of the situation, he also found that he was not fulfilled in life with the numerous women he slept with, also realizing that at times his sexual performance floundered because there was no emotional connection with his lover. With all the knowledge conveyed, he also described his growing friendship with Mystery, befriending and rooming with Courtney Love, sarging Britney Spears and meeting one of the most powerful and charismatic AMOGs (alpha male other guy), Tom Cruise, he goes deeper into his understanding of how the PUA world can build one up and take one down.

Part memoir, part reference for those who may consider themselves AFCs, part cautionary tale in revealing the shadier aspects of being within the PUA community, it is all the while increasingly entertaining. As the men learn that the differences between men and women are not as astronomical as it may seem, some of the members of this community also have the piece of mind to evolve and seek bigger and better things with this newfound knowledge. As a female reader, it is both daunting and intoxicating to read Strauss’ account of how absorbing and scary the community became, with mantras like ‘Bros before hos, but sometimes hos before bros.’ The Game is a reality check for most, yet some may find it sacrosanct. Either way, Strauss’s conscious and epiphany are what make The Game a great coming-of-age story for a man no matter what age.