Title: The Everything Sex Signs Book: Astrology Between the Sheets Author: Constance Stellas Publisher: Adams Media Publish Date: 2007 Pages: 271 Genres:: Non-Fiction,Reviewer: Chris R. Morgan

Rating:

Every now and then, there comes a time when you or someone you know spends several minutes going on several hours talking up a celestial number at some, I don’t know, box social. As the minutes go by, you start to run out of things to talk about—the desire to impress the potential partner is low, you’re just looking for a screw. After a few more minutes of awkward silence you will ask or be asked, “What’s your sign?” The common response is to shoot the conversation dead with the metaphorical revolver that is the blank stare, no one goes home happy. However, Constance Stellas has an answer to relieve the world’s young bravado cats and kittens of such misery—by actually using astrology.

The Everything Sex Signs Book aims to be the bible of partner prowling by way of stargazing.  Within these pages contain the end all and be all of how to use the signs of the zodiac to be sexy with someone, perhaps even for more than a fleeting one-night stand. Stellas, whose astrological talents are used in feng shui and gift consulting, has a way of making something spiritual out of the mundane. With this book, it is said you have the key to unlocking the dungeon of loneliness for which your soulmate dwells by way of analyzing the characteristics of each zodiac sign.

The book is sectioned off by each sign (Scorpio, Taurus, Virgo, Cancer, etc.) with subdivisions of each feature unique to those with the given sign. The chapters also contain "essential" tidbits that best prepare you for what to expect when dealing with, say, a woman who is a Leo. Apparently, they’re image conscious and go all out to make sure their tits and asses are nice and firm—go figure. It also has "facts." For example, a Virgo man has no problem receiving a gift, like the book The Joy of Sex, because the pictures stimulate him and the instructional nature of the book is helpful. Concepts like these are often lofty. While this cannot be handled with any serious authority, the writing beams with confidence and clarity. The positive-thinking, self-help angle is all-encompassing. Anyone can do anything if you have the know-how.

The new age phenomenon has clued me in that we live in a world in which some can't rely on simple idealism anymore. For instance, it is professed in this book that there is no better way to lure a mate than through astrology. As an idealist, I'm inclined to believe that the best way to land some sort of fling is to play it casual by using the personality traits and allure you know you have. New Agers go above and beyond such simple thinking and propel themselves into a mystic logic that is beyond me. When I look at the stars, I see white specs of gaseous clusters. Despite the fact that Stellas pretty much uses a roundabout way to asses the concerns, wants and needs of every human looking for love, no matter what "sign" you are, this book doesn't lend much credibility to the person who asks what one's sign is.