Reviewed by M. Blythe
A touch of confusion abounds along with the pleasure that the Slimline G Twin from Topco's Wildfire Collection provides. I'm still not quite sure I understand the packaging claim, but we'll come back to that shortly.
First, some of the goods: At only around $15, the purchase price makes it very affordable for the financially challenged and/or the scrooges of the world to go out and buy this puppy. Once you get it home, you find out that the well-behaved buzz quality lets you choose your own speed-- a fantastic benefit. It comes in the attractive colors of mint or creamsicle (although, flavor and two AA batteries not included).
Luckily, there's not a pungent rubbery smell; indeed, it smells almost pleasant. Cleanup is simple; just a quick wash with liquid antibacterial soap and water thanks to the O-ring, which brings me to the fact that it's waterproof; always a nice option if you want to use it in the tub, shower, Niagra Falls, etc. Just don't lose that O-ring or you'll be forced to play on dry land.
Now the not-so-great details about the Slimline G Twin: Let's start with the sound effects. While the slower speeds are not terribly audible, as the speed progresses, the motor gets much louder. By the time you work it up to the fastest speed, there's an infuriating racket that sounds like you might be getting intimate with an oversized and severely angst-ridden bumble bee.
Now then, the Wildfire Collection says that the "ergonomic design means an ideal fit in two places"; this is where the confusion began. You got me! Oh, yes, you unkindly teased me Wildfire; I thought I was going to get an anal jolt of pleasure with this thing to enhance my experience, of course. But, try as I might I couldn't comfortably get from point A to point B at the same time with my slim mint play toy. And, believe me I poked and prodded every which angle I could think of, but because of the shape of the vibe I could not comfortably get to my second destination whilst still enchanting my original target.
However, once I finally gave up my desperate anal way of thinking, I rotated the vibe so the little knobby guy buzzed my clit and then I was good to go and back to comfort. And that's when I began to truly appreciate the "dual motors [that] generate powerful sensations in two locations", and then I suddenly understood the logic behind the magical name of the Slimline G Twin. My G spot is still pulsing with the magic and I am… still smiling. SlimlineGTwin
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