Reviewed by A. Marquardt
Keychain vibrators have always amused me. It’s like, “Really? You can’t even leave the house without a tiny vibrator just in case?” But I suppose they come in handy for travel, and I have been known to keep one in the Caboodles I take along when I’m doing a show. But the real question for me is: Does anyone actually keep these things on their keychains? Their actual keychains, with their house keys and the keys to their car or their gym locker? It would seem to invite questions, a vibrator on a keychain, questions not everyone would like to answer. The Silicone Taffy Tickler Glow to Go is an especially high-profile keychain addition for a couple of reasons:
- It features a bright green and pink color scheme.
- It glows in the dark. (Seriously. It’s great.)
- It looks like a mutant, vaguely radioactive caterpillar made of fondant.
So carrying this thing around next to your Duane Reade keychain card would be a bold move, to be sure: At some point, someone will ask what the thing is and you’ll have to explain yourself, which is slightly awkward, but mostly just annoying.
The Taffy Tickler, so named (I assume) because of its resemblance to a mid-pull piece of the Atlantic City confection (I’d say the flavors might be something like pistachio and strawberry, if it were actually made out of the candy), is a powerful little guy, courtesy of three AG-13 batteries (included). So powerful, in fact, that it’s nearly impossible to actually turn this vibe off without unscrewing the cap a tad. Even before the cap was on all the way, it started buzzing away. This poses a serious problem for the keychain aspect of the vibrator: What if, unbeknownst to you, the circuit connects and your keyring starts buzzing in your bag? Or in your pocket? In a movie, the situation could be milked for comedic awkwardness, but in real life it’s only comedy if it’s happening to someone else.
That said, if you can wrangle the Taffy Tickler into submission to only turn on when you want it to, it provides a real bang for your buck, considering its small size. A dial allows you to gradually adjust the intensity of the vibration, and the silicone droplets all over the body provide additional stimulation. The droplets might look terrifying at first, but trust me—they’re super-soft and definitely add something to the party. It’s waterproof, too, perfect to stash in the pocket of your robe to accompany you to the shower if you don’t get enough alone time elsewhere. Just be forewarned: It will turn on when you don’t want it to. If you’re willing to brave the awkwardness, the Taffy Tickler Glow to Go belongs on your keychain. Adam&EveTaffyTicklerGlowtoGo
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